1. New Beyonce
Ok world, I get it. She’s a superhuman goddess that can do any and everything. And it’s getting boring. After this On The Run Tour, what’s next? I’d love a new female superstar that can sing, dance, and entertainment, all while maintaining the delicate balance of sexy, class, and excitement.
2. A super album starring Black Hippy, Slaughterhouse, and Pro Era
The New School of Hip Hop reawakened that dormant cusp of my soul that was bored and irritated at the substandard level of today’s rap music. But this new era, spearheaded by Kendrick Lamar and J. Cole, is lively and innovative; cleverly blending lyricism with catchy production. If these three lyrical super groups were to join forces, I’m sure to morph into a puddle of happiness.
3. A dope ass female rapper
The game is missing a top notch female rapper. No, Nicki Minaj is not a rapper, get over it. I’m talking about a Lauryn Hill-Eve-Queen Latifah-MC Lyte-type rapper. You know, a female contender that can rival the men with bars, flow, and delivery. I need this. Angel Haze looks promising.
4. UGG Death
Ladies, kill your Uggs. Uggs are done. Why Uggs were so culturally relevant to begin with is beyond me … but, in 2014 Uggs shall be no more. Especially if your Uggs are leant with snow stains. Get rid of them. Move on. There’s so much more out there.
5. A progressive transgender politician
After President Obama, Democrats and progressives need to follow-up with another earth shattering qualified candidate. It looks like Hillary is going to take the torch … but, on the off chance she doesn’t, I think it’s time for a transgender candidate to enter the political fray.
6. Another Lupita Nyong’o
Black people, we can’t let Lupita be tokenized. Yes, she’s fantastic and amazing and awesome and glamorous and intelligent and talented and every other positive adjective that human language can possibly articulate. We’re all madly in love with her, but we need to demand that we get even more representation in pop culture. Mainstream America tends to promote the tacit rule that only Black woman can succeed at a time. Let’s not let this happen.
7. Kendrick Lamar drops another classic album, wins a Grammy, and auctions it off to charity
What a great middle finger to the Grammy world it would be if K. Dot wins the Grammys that were stolen from him, donates them to charity, then gives the proceeds to the Black boys in Compton. Watch those Black boys fly after a showing like that.
8. Jay Electronica finally drops his album
We’ve been waiting for this album for a million years. It’s time.
9. Oprah, Magic Johnson, and Sean Combs buy The Clippers.
Oh, the irony. On so many levels.
10. Men who get beard transplants are banished from society.
And by far, the dumbest trend I ever heard of … men who THOUSANDS of dollars for facial hair. I thought the hipster mantra was to not *try* to be so effffffffin cool man. ::::facepalmforever:::: If I ever meet anyone who willingly admits they got a beard transplant, I will graciously kick them in the head.